“Kiss today goodbye and point me to tomorrow.”
- Edward Kleban/Marvin Hamlisch -
Have you ever encountered Deja Vu? You know. The feeling that things are happening all over again.? Hmm…well, I love the song by Crosby, Stills and Nash, but as for reality, please count me out!
It's been written by many in the mystical/inspirational genre that “mind is over matter,” and while that adage may have some validity, the last time I looked down from one of those Tall buildings, I figured the Law of Gravity would overrule my mind, and my dreams of “Superman” were just that.
Dreams. Wow! Have you had any dreams lately? Interesting? Boring? Scary? Prophetic?
The world is filled with events and occurrences which sometimes defy the imagination, but with some critical reasoning and encouragement from others, sometimes these “unforeseen” events become blessings, although I think most of our personal juries are in recess on that point of law.
Racheal….!!! I've penned my love sonnet before (Smitten…9/19)…and a follow-up to what was going to be my first “date" in a numberless shines of the moon.
Then there was a follow-up (Dr. Vacant's Unanswering Service…11/16)…a commentary on the lack of care which I’d received, following the news of my paramour's accident, and which kept her hospitalized until I could bail her out. (Can we say “What the hey is up?” I'd choose other language which shoots the arrow into the concept of hey.)
Now for the most saddening, if not critically absurd and ineffective portion of our “romance.” The “Interlude of Insanity,” if I may be so bold.
Racheal kissed that day goodbye weeks ago, when she walked out of the hospital to be reunited with her little princess who'd been absent the member of her family while recovering. So the “fix was in,” as they say, and she'd returned to work.
There were other consequential events which she'd never bargained on. For example, her housemate's car was “Totalled” by some unknown “someone,” which left my sweetheart in a proverbial “hornet's nest" with the friend who'd allowed her to use the vehicle to meet me.
Racheal's now pointed to the concept of “tomorrow,” which never comes, unless you work the 12 hour night shift as I did for years. But the point is, it never “feels" like tomorrow, if there's such a feeling. Tomorrow is always today is always NOW, and now, my dearest and hopeful partner in life has faced an unnecessary rule of the current “hospital regimes" which are claiming closures because……(you can fill in the blanks. I've read the stories!)
The gutter is not calling her, but my expectations to see her have graduated to something like “….But……” (what a sad word….)..
When it's all come out of the wash, she has a listless frown, now knowing that the hospital where she'd been incarcerated in for health (and I admire the healthcare profession. My family have been in field for years)…but the profits of the hospital?
They called the police on her and told her to cough up $600 and took the paycheck she was supposed to get today. How rudely awakening!
Sarcasm is a helpful commodity when seeking to understand what seems to be totally confusing events, and when I checked the local Hippocratic Oath recently, I discovered a few interesting notions which don't appear to be followed lately, and if you’re fond of the news in my state, there's a witches' brew occuring over a former CEO of several hospitals who's attempting to skirt out of town, but the Feds are on his ass now. And it's something related to profitability and lack of unaccountability to his staff and patients who he'd promised to care for.
As the word turns, this is what I've found to be instructive: Hippocratic Oath -
*Be Fair - charge only for your services, and do not profit financially from your patients. (Hmmm…sound familiar?)
*Provide Care - “….do not harm them.” A case could be built upon the simple fact that many patients in our current environment of greed, often do not have the resources to jump out of their holes with six hundred bananas, and in Racheal's case, the plan to meet Yours Truly has been placed on the left field left burner on the backside of the vacant seat in the Nosebleed Section (smile) and there's plenty of company with me.
*Behave Well - “..avoid impropriety and respect their value systems.” We each could write novels on this one.
*Be non-judgmental - Sure as the Dr. Vacant experience taught me to discount the alleged doctor's diminished view of me and refused to answer questions and disparaged my love for the victim of the crash - my Racheal.
*Improve care - “..shall provide…encouragement for patients in their effort to sustain the patients' own health.” Now how does taking bread out of a person's mouth improve care?
There was no encouragement to come up with a payment plan, and certainly zero notification that the good ol' boys at Hospital University were gonna call the “dogs of retribution" on my fiancee'.
In conclusion, and this is by no means any closing curtain on the performance, but I believe in something they call Divine Providence, and if there was someone who’d encouraged the person called “ME" this morning, it was the one who’d told me it was “..probably a blessing in disguise,” as “God” had another plan. No commentary on that one. I get it, for what it's worth. But her following remarks threw me off .
“The ball's now in your court.” Really. I told her I haven't had any ball in my court for years, apart from my own personal ones, and she smiled.
And let it be written that bondage always has a solution. It means “taking someone outside of the situation to intervene,” and I'm a little on the melancholic side of intervention these days, because the “money coming down from the clouds" has not arrived in the mail as of yet, and our eventual meeting to seal our love has been postponed indefinitely.
My Mama used to advise me to take my time and not be in so much of rush, but if you're rushing, doing it “right!” (Sure with Eagle Eyes all upon us!)
To be sure… we do! Yeah…I got that. Worked for many who chose to wear those colors on their lapels.
“To the extent that I live by these precepts, I shall be….”
Time to come clean.
What are we really up to here? Profitability or Patient Care?
How about something called Integrity, the forming of the heart and mind to become a truly compassionate caregiver!